Questions You Should Ask Before Marriage | LoveToKnow
In my talk on dating I tell people that there is so much more to dating then questions that I think you should go through before you get married. Questions to Ask before Marriage for Engaged Couples gift idea This could be a specific date night for the two of you or you could do a few questions While you are planning for your rockin' marriage - check out the Diva's Top 10 Tips to. In my years as a psychologist and advice columnist, I've seen a lot of individuals in . should be spread to other friends and family when they are first dating.
How do you presently feel about sex? Have you ever had any negative sexual experiences?
How important is sex on your honeymoon night? Where do you lack information dealing with sex? Can you talk freely about sex? What questions do you have about sex after this conversation? Religious Background Will you go to church as a couple?
If so which one? How were you brought up? Are you a non-practicing Christian? What place does religion play in your life? Does your life reflect your answer? What is the religious background of your boyfriend or girlfriend? What are the differences in your beliefs? How important do you think your faith will play in your future? Do you want a church wedding?
Do you want a Christian Marriage?
276 QUESTIONS TO ASK BEFORE YOU MARRY
Do you even know what this is? Do you think it is important for you to go to church as a family? When you have children? Do you presently pray for each other? What questions do you have about religious background after this conversation? Dating When did you begin dating? What are your political views?
Would you rather be rich and miserable or poor and happy? Who will make the biggest decisions of the household? What would you do if someone said something bad about me? Would you follow the advice of your family before your spouse? What do you believe the role of a wife is? Who should do household chores? What do you believe the role of a husband is? Handling Finances Money, debt, and finances are important things to talk about before marriage.
How do you feel about debt? Would you share all money with your spouse or split the money into different accounts? What are your views on saving money? What are your views on spending money? What if we both want something but can't afford both? How well do you budget? Do you feel it is important to save for retirement?
Would you be willing to get a second job if we had financial problems? Do you have any debt? What if a family member wants to borrow a large sum of money? Who will take care of the financial matters of the household?
Entertainment Don't forget to have fun. Find out what your future spouse thinks by including some entertainment and lifestyle points in your list of questions for couples. Do you enjoy traveling? How often would you like to travel? Where would you like to travel? How important is spending time alone to you? How would you feel about me going on a trip with the girls boys for a couple of weeks? How important is spending time with friends to you? What would be the perfect weekday evening to you?
What would we do if we both had a break from work, but each of us had different ideas on how to spend it? Extended Family Include some family and relation inquiries among the questions to ask your partner. How often would you want to visit your family?
How often will your family visit us? How often would you want my family to visit? How often would you want to visit my family? Do you have a family history of diseases or genetic abnormalities?
What if one of your family members said he disliked me? How would you handle holiday family visits? Do you believe in life after death? Does your religion impose any behavioral restrictions dietary, social, familial, sexual that would affect your partner?
Do you consider yourself a religious person? Do you engage in spiritual practices outside of organized religion? How important is it to you for your partner to share your religious beliefs? How important is it to you for your children to be raised in your religion? Is spirituality a part of your daily life and practice? Has religion or spiritual practice ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
Does popular culture have an important impact on your life? Do you spend time reading about, watching, or discussing actors, musicians, models, or other celebrities?ScoopWhoop: Things Every Couple Should Talk About Before Getting Married
Do you think most celebrities have a better, more exciting life than you do? By the way, if they do, maybe it's because they are living their lives, while you are watching them live their lives. Are you wasting the opportunity and gift to live your own life?
Do you regularly go to the movies, or do you prefer to rent movies and watch them at home? What is your favorite style of music?
Do you attend concerts featuring your favorite musicians? Do you enjoy going to museums or art shows? Do you like to dance? Do you like to watch TV for entertainment? Have attitudes or behaviors around popular culture ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship? What is your idea of a fun day? Do you enjoy spectator sports? Are certain seasons off-limits for other activities because of football, baseball, basketball, or other sports?
How important is it to you that you and your partner enjoy the same leisure activities? How much money do you regularly spend on leisure activities? Do you enjoy activities that might make your partner uncomfortable, such as hanging out in bars drinking, going to strip clubs, or gambling? Have leisure time issues ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship? Is it important for you to attend social events regularly, or does the prospect rarely appeal to you?
Do you look forward to at least one night out every week, or do you prefer to enjoy yourself at home? Does your work involve attending social functions? If so, are these occasions a burden or a pleasure? Do you expect your spouse to be present, or do you prefer that your spouse not be present?
Or do you socialize with a diverse mix of people? Have differences about socializing ever been a factor for you in the breakup of a relationship? Which if any holidays do you believe are the most important to celebrate? Do you maintain a family tradition around certain holidays? How important are birthday celebrations to you? Do you enjoy traveling, or are you a homebody? Are vacation getaways an important part of your yearly planning? How much of your annual income do you designate for vacation and travel expenses?
Do you have favorite vacation destinations? Do you believe it's wasteful to spend money on vacations to distant places? Do you think it's important to have a passport? To speak a foreign language? Have disputes about travel and vacation ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship? What is your level of formal education? Is your education a source of pride or shame? Do you regularly sign up for courses that interest you, or enroll in advanced-learning programs that will help you in your career or profession?
Have disparities in education ever been a source of tension for you in a relationship, or ended a relationship? How do you feel about private school education for children? Do you have a limit on how much you would be willing to invest in private school education?
Have education levels or priorities ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship? Do you own or lease a car? Would you ever consider not having a car? Is the year, make, and model of the car you drive important to you? Are fuel efficiency and environmental protection factors when you choose a car? Given the availability of reliable public transportation, would you prefer not to drive a car at all?
How much time do you spend maintaining and caring for your vehicle? Are you reluctant to let others drive your car? How long is your daily commute? Is it by bus, train, car, or carpool? Do you consider yourself a good driver? Have you ever received a speeding ticket?
QUESTIONS TO ASK BEFORE YOU MARRY
Have cars or driving ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship? How much time do you spend on the phone every day? Do you have a cell phone? Do you belong to any Internet chat groups? Do you spend significant time each day writing c-mails? Do you have an unlisted telephone number? Do you consider yourself a communicator or a private person? What are the circumstances under which you would not answer the telephone, cell phone, or BlackBerry?
Has modem communication ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship? Do you like to eat most of your meals sitting at the table, or do you tend to eat on the run? Do you love to cook? Do you love to eat? When you were growing up, was it important that everybody be present for dinner? Do you follow a specific diet regimen that limits your food choices? Do you expect others in your household to adhere to certain dietary restrictions?
In your family is food ever used as a bribe or a proof of love? Has eating ever been a source of shame for you? Have eating and food ever been a source of tension and stress in a relationship? Have they ever been a factor in the breakup of a relationship?
Are there household responsibilities you believe to be the sole domain of a man or a woman? Why do you believe this? Do you believe that marriages are stronger if a woman defers to her husband in most areas? Do you need to feel either in control or taken care of? How important is equality in a marriage? Do you believe that roles in your family should be filled by the person best equipped for the job, even if it is an unconventional arrangement?
How did your family view the roles of girls and boys, men and women? In your family; could anyone do any job as long as it got done well? Have different ideas about gender roles ever been a source of tension for you in a relationship, or the cause of a breakup? What did you learn about race and ethnic differences as a child?
Which of those beliefs from childhood do you still carry; and which have you shed? Does your work environment look more like the United Nations, or like a mirror of yourself? How about your personal life? How would you feel if your child dated someone of a different race or ethnicity?
Questions to Ask Before You Get EngagedHarvest House
How would you feel if he or she married this person? Are you aware of your own biases regarding race and ethnicity? Where did they come from? Have race, ethnicity, and differences ever been a source of tension and stress for you in a relationship? Is it important to you that your partner shares your vision of race, ethnicity, and difference? Would you consider yourself a morning person or a night person?
Do you judge people who have a different waking and sleeping clock than you? What is your favorite season of the year? When you disagree with your partner, do you tend to fight or withdraw? What is your idea of a fair division of labor in your household? Do you consider yourself an easygoing person, or are you most comfortable with a firm plan of action? How much sleep do you need every night?
Do you like to be freshly showered and wearing clean clothes every day, even on weekends or vacations? What is your idea of perfect relaxation?
What makes you really angry? What makes you most joyful?